


as i lay peacefully

by BestOfOne



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Forgive Me, Hurt, M/M, Mild Language, Not Beta Read, Post-Blind Betrayal, Sad Ending, no comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-13
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:15:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24162658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BestOfOne/pseuds/BestOfOne
Summary: Just another day in the Commonwealth.
Relationships: Paladin Danse/Male Sole Survivor
Comments: 1
Kudos: 13





	as i lay peacefully

It’s cold where he is, and the moon is reflecting off the vast expanse of ocean ahead of him. In the distance, he can see the still burning wreck that once was the Prydwen. 

The bottle at his side is just about empty, so he uncaps another. Soon, there’s four more next to him and he still feels it. Aching and utterly numb at the same time. 

He abandons his pity party and starts stripping out of his clothes. Armor piled on the shore and gun next to it, he doesn’t care right now. He keeps the tags around his neck, afraid the last remnants of Danse will disappear. 

Slowly, he wades into the ocean, and then begins to swim. 

In the vastness of it all, he lets go. His limbs stop paddling and his body rises and begins to float. His eyes slip shut, and his breathing eases. 

_”Why don’t you ever leave that suit?”_

_”I’ve grown accustomed to wearing it all the time. It’s best to be prepared for anything.”_

The tags that rest against the base of his throat are cold. Just like they’d always been since being given to him. Proof of the kill. 

_”Danse, get the fuck out of your armor. You’re bleeding out, please.”_

_An adventure gone sideways, he could see the blood leaking out of the Paladin’s suit. And yet, he wanted to trek on._

_”It’s best we continue until we’re safe.”_

_”Screw safety! You might literally die!”_

Goosebumps are starting to break out along his body, the chill biting into him. There are no waves big enough to drown him, so he lets the subtle push of water move him around. 

_“If you could do one thing, no matter how impossible it seemed, what would you do?”_

_A moment of silence between the two, no one around but the stars._

_“I’d—,” it’s so strange to see Danse of all people hesitant, “I’d like to experience what it would be like before all this. Prewar America,” Danse’s admittance was shy, fleeting and open._

Distantly, he thinks he hears gunfire. Or perhaps the crackling of the burning remains of the Brotherhood. But he doesn’t move from his position, a speck in a vast world. The sky is painted with stars. Reminding him of many nights of staring up at them. 

_“Do you miss it?”_

_Danse asks this out of the blue, during the night as they’re moving to their mission objective._

_“Miss what?”_

_“Before the bombs,” of course he does. His family, Nora and Shaun, the life he’d had._

_“I don’t know. A part of me does, but another part is okay with what I have.”_

_“What was it like?”_

_“Well, for starters, you weren’t liable to get shot every minute or so. And the grass—! Everything was green, and people were nice,” old nostalgia claws its way forward in his head._

The water makes a white noise type sound as his ears are submerged. He swears he can almost hear Danse chastising him for being in the water. 

_“Damn rain. It better not rust out my suit,” they’d been a little too slow when traveling outside the city, and got caught in a downpour with no cover in sight. Danse had been a little more than upset with it._

_“Hindsight 20/20, we should check the weather before we go clunking around the Commonwealth.”_

_“How would one check the weather these days?”_

_“Back then, we had these things called weather balloons we sent up into the atmosphere. Now, I guess you just look up and make a guess.”_

_“Smart ass.”_

_“You asked, who was I to deny you?”_

_It continued like that until they’d found some old prewar house. Nothing but debris and a few pieces of scrap. That night he’d taken first watch, just so Danse had a little more time to sleep._

He almost wishes the ocean would take him away. But the tide was ebbing away, and soon the sun would be up. Another day without— 

_“My orders are to stay here and guard the site. I’ll return as soon as I’m able,” he had his reservations about leaving Danse in some prewar weapons site in the middle of the Glowing Sea, but the man wouldn’t budge._

_“You promise?” At this point, both of them had been skirting around each other. Close enough to touch, but far enough to reconsider._

_“I’m a man of my word,” Danse flashed a rare smile at him._

_“Yeah, and I’ll hold you to it,” like any bad feeling, as soon as he stepped out the door, something screamed inside of him to go back._

If one had stumbled upon the prewar man in his current state, they’d think he was dead. Floating face up on the ocean close to shore. Either that, or an angel. The tags around his neck giving him a blue almost ethereal glow. A fallen star?

_Searching for so long, Haylen had given him hope. He found the bunker near Greentop, bringing no one but himself._

_He immediately dispatched any and all security Danse set up. As he stood in the doorway of the elevator, hesitance took hold of him. Did he know? Was he truly a threat?_

_“Danse? Are you here?”_

_The man in question stood alone in a crumbling room not far from the elevator._

_“You shouldn’t be here. Unless—he sent you of all people to kill me.”_

Something akin to a knife in his heart made him wince. For a moment, he forgot where he was. The water sloshed briefly before settling. He calmed himself again, submerging in memories. 

_He couldn’t do it. He didn’t care if it made him weak, he was going to save Danse’s life. He was going to help him escape. But they were caught, Maxson waiting at the entrance._

_“He’s an abomination. Technology run amok. If he is allowed to live any longer,” he hated Maxson with a passion. He knows Danse looked up to the man, but he’d have no qualms with killing him._

_“After all I’ve done for you, don’t I deserve a chance to speak?”_

_“You’ve sided with the enemy, time and time again. I should just kill both of you.”_

A roll of thunder. A storm at this time? He’s already soaked to his bones, what’s a little more drops? 

_“After everything, you still want to kill him?! He supported you! He’d die for you!”_

_“Then let him.”_

His leg has healed since then. The open wound replaced with thick scar tissue on his thigh. It’s only stopped hurting when he’s cold. 

_The laser whizzes past, searing into his flesh. God, it burns more than the initial cryo freezing._

_He’s ashamed to say he immediately drops to the floor in pain. It burns so much._

_“Why the fuck would you—?!”_

_He’s grasping at the wound, only aware of it and the man who inflicted it up him. He briefly feels Danse moving to help him._

_“Even now, you fake compassion. Disgusting.”_

_Maxson takes aim again, but not at him. His target is kneeling next to him. Danse’s words barely manage to register in his ears when Maxson fires._

_“It’s going to be okay,” before the laser burns itself through Danse’s skull, dropping his limp body upon him._

Oh how he wishes to be swallowed whole by the sea. But he can’t. So as the sun rises, he swims back to shore and puts his gear back on. He begins his walk back to Sanctuary. As normal as he could. Just another day in the Commonwealth.

**Author's Note:**

> I didn’t specifically not mention the Sole Survivor’s name. It kinda just struck me to write it all as “he”. Only Danse and Maxson were specifically named. 
> 
> This is my take on what could’ve happened during and after the events of Blind Betrayal in which Danse pays a price and Sole is left to grieve. 
> 
> (Side note: unrelated to the other work I’m currently posting. This is just some oneshot I needed to get out.)


End file.
